to the retreat...

tavaivaasmi tavaivaasmi
na jivaami tvayaa vinaa
iti vijnaaya devi tvam
naya mam caranaantikam
I am Yours alone! I am Yours alone! I cannot live without You! O queen, please understand this and bring me to Your feet.-by Srila Raghunatha dasa Goswami

so tomorrow i will go to the winter retreat!swami tripurari will be there and devotees from his family and others too!
i will write about it here...but i wont have internet there...so it'll take some time!
try to survive...

j.

Message of the Bhagavat

this song makes me happy.but still "in praise of others" is the best shelter song ever!i mean the orginal version on attaining the supreme!

Shelter:Mantra
Earth can be a lonely place
Blank stares on the people's face
I contemplate their pointless chase
That traps me and my friends
Is this the place where I belong?
Where did we go wrong?
Will it last real long?
Are you too singing this song?
Sometimes I feel it
Sometimes I feel all so alone
And yes yes I must confess
I feel so far from home
Mantra take me home I trust you
Mantra take me home
Take me to the place where I belong
Life's a puzzle the thoughtful solve
But most choose not to get involved
Because of this we don't envolve
Just look around my friend
And life's meaning can be hard to grasp
All that's certain is it won't last
We're all spirits looking for transcendence
Oh mantra grant me tha independence

links of the day:
krsnacore-blog
http://sit properly
krsnacore

EDIT:
GOODLIFE SIGNS SHELTER
NYHC Legends sign worldwide deal with Good Life Recordings.

Good Life Recordings announces today, December 16th, 2005, a world-wide deal for the new Shelter- album, tentatively titled 'Eternal'.
Licensing partners for North and South America are welcomed.
'ETERNAL' includes 4-5 REAL hit songs and a reworked version of the classic 'In Defense of Reality', for a total of 11 songs on the album. Shelter have released a handful of classic albums on labels like Revelation Records, Equal Vision, Victory and Century Media. Their absolute hit-album was 'Mantra', released through Roadrunner Records in the 90's.
'Eternal' is back in the grand style of 'Mantra' days, and will NOT disappoint.
The seed that blossomed into SHELTER was planted years ago in the rich fields of the New York hardcore/punk scene of the mid-eighties. It was then that SHELTER vocalist Ray Cappo, and guitarist Porcell formed the legendary 80's hardcore band Youth Of Today. After the disbanding of Youth Of Today in 1988 Cappo left on a one-way ticket to India to study eastern philosophy, Sanskrit, natural medicine, and Yoga. The philosophies that Cappo learned became the backbone of SHELTER which he formed with Porcell upon his return to the U.S. Krishnacore was thus invented and brought to the masses.
As vocalist Ray Cappo puts it "I think music is like my "dharma" or calling. Everybody has something they feel natural at doing...so music did and will always magnetically drag me back even though sometimes I move away from it." Shelter sets themselves apart from other rock bands with their unique blend of spiritual and melodic, yet hard-edged music.
The bands message is one of hope and inspiration. Shelter champion vegetarianism, natural foods, and a positive drug-free lifestyle.

the big 3 0 ! ! !

Lord Siva said: "I do not know the truth about Krishna, but a devotee of Lord Krishna knows all the truth. Out of all the devotees of Lord Krishna, Prahlada is the greatest."

today is the auspicious appearance day of ME!!! ;)
now i've been fighting 30 years in this age of kali!
hopefully one day i will win the fight?!?

what is better to sing and listen on your birthday than MANASA DEHO GEHA by srila bhaktivinoda thakur.right now im listening srila a.c.bhaktivedanta swami prabhupada singing it! :)
Manasa Deho Geha
(from Saranagati by Srila Bhaktivinoda Thakur)
1
manasa, deho, geho, jo kichu mor
arpilu tuwa pade, nanda-kisor!
2
sampade vipade, jivane-marane
day mama gela, tuwa o-pada barane
3
marobirakhobi - jo iccha tohara
nitya-dasa prati tuwa adhikara
4
janmaobi moe iccha jadi tor
bhakta-grhe jani janma hau mor
5
kita-janma hau jatha tuwa das
bahir-mukha brahma-janme nahi as
6
bhukti-mukti-sprha vihina je bhakta
labhaite tako sanga anurakta
7
janaka, janani, dayita, tanay
prabhu, guru, pati--tuhu sarva-moy
8
bhakatvinoda kohe, suno kana!
radha-natha! tuhu hamara parana
1) Mind, body, and family, whatever may be mine, I have surrendered at Your lotus feet, O youthful son of Nanda!
2) In good fortune or in bad, in life or at death, all my difficulties have disappeared by choosing those feet of Yours as my only shelter.
3) Slay me or protect me as You wish, for You are the master of Your eternal servant.
4) If it is Your will that I be born again, then may it be in the home of Your devotee.
5) May I be born again even as a worm, so long as I may remain Your devotee. I have no desire to be born as a Brahma averse to You.
6) I yearn for the company of that devotee who is completely devoid of all desire for worldly enjoyment or liberation.
7) Father, mother, lover, son, Lord, preceptor, and husband; You are everything to me.
8) Thakura Bhaktivinoda says, "O Kana, please hear me! O Lord of Radha, You are my life and soul!"

the link is to ASHE-journals KRISHNA CONCIOUNESS special number.it has some nice writings.you can read it online or download the PDF.
ASHE-journal

this link is to the VERANDA VIEWS site.many many pictures of my guru maharaja.
VERANDA VIEWS

online vaisnava songbook
vaisnava songbook

offering....

this is one of my favorite bhajans.its the first verse of Ista-deve Vijnapti by Srila Narottama Dasa Thakura.
"hari hari! bifale janama gonainu
manusya-janama paiya, radha-krsna na bhajiya,
janiya suniya bisa khainu
O Lord Hari I have spent my life uselessly. Having obtained a human birth and having not worshipped Radha and Krsna, I have knowingly drunk poison."
drinking poison is pretty easy at this age of kali.we are living in middle of poison!

i just wrote my offering to my guru maharaja b.s.govinda maharaja...this time it was really hard...i think i had "writers block" or something... :( at least i wrote something...

radha-krsna prana mora jugala-kisora
jivane marane gati aro nahi mora
The divine couple, Sri Radha and Krsna, are my life and soul. In life or death I have no other refuge but Them. from Sakhi-vrnde Vijnapti by Srila Narottama Dasa Thakura

jaiva dharma

im right now trying to get my butt up from the floor...im going to jaiva dharma meeting.there we read,talk and eat...sometimes chanting singing...but more later...

its actually krisangis fault that im going there.cause she informed that there is some VEGAN prasadam for me the non-barbarian!!! ;)

jay jay sri radhe radhe ! ! !

.family tree.

"And then I see a darkness
Oh no, I see a darkness
Do you know how much I love you
Cause I'm hoping some day soon
You'll save me from this darkness" - lyrics of I See Darkness by Johnny Cash

im writing this while listening to mr.johnny cash!
this blog is my desperate try to be in contact with my spiritual family and this is also krsna conciouness therapy to me! ;)
as being the only disciple of srila b.s.sundar govinda maharaja here in finland.i pretty often feel left alone...i know that i have lots of great devotee friends around me,but still...
and soon my dear gurudevas vyasapuja will come and again i will have a party alone with my deitys...
i feel like a teen kid now rambling about how bad his parents are etc. :)

"Jesus If you hear my last breath
Don't leave me here Left to die a lonely death I know I have sinned but Lord I'm suffering" - lyrics of Spiritual by Johnny Cash